Having goals is helpful in generating a fulfilling life. The process helps us to take active steps to achieve a desired outcome, but what if we are not sure of what our desired outcome is? How do we define exactly what we want, if we lack any direction on what makes us happy? Should we be looking for financial freedom if our underlying beliefs are that wealthy people are bad? What about relationships, should our end goal be to be married and have a family, if we are unsure of what love is and how to generate it for ourselves first? Should our first goal be to generate peace within ourselves and then add all the beautiful life experiences second?
When I look at my life and all the lovely experiences I have had, they are also coupled with the hindsight of the work I have had to do in the background to achieve those goals and dreams. I was unable to enjoy my life until I set the goal of working through my insecurities and self limiting beliefs first.
Some of the main goals I wanted were: great relationships (with people in general), to feel more peace than turmoil, to enjoy my work, to have financial freedom and to fall in love. For the best part, I assumed that these were goals that involved others to show up and make my life easier. Instead, they were actually goals that needed me to show up for myself. I needed to do the internal work around them so I could learn to enjoy them. It also meant I needed to learn the things I liked and disliked in each of these areas to truly reach my goals.
It is no use wanting to work in a job that generates a fantastic monthly salary if I hate getting out of bed to show up to that job. Why should having more money mean I sacrifice my peace, joy and happiness on a daily basis? Does this then seep into other areas of my life? Am I now too tired to enjoy quality time with my loved ones? Am I now working more hours than having time to enjoy the money I have earned on traveling the world or having great downtime? There has to be balanced and knowing when to honour the actual goal here – financial freedom to enjoy your life.
How do we identify what we really want?
There are numerous books, guides, videos and general information that will help you identify what you want and the best ways to set your goals. While all are very helpful, most do not explain why understanding your unconscious motives are just as important.
Napoleon Hill states that ‘Our only limitations are those that we set in our own minds’. For me, if I am in complete understanding of what I want, why I want it and a deep belief that I am worthy of it, it makes my execution and journey of the desired goal easier to attain.
In the process of understanding what you want and why you want it, you will bring to the surface any limiting beliefs that may need work.
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About the Author
Founder and CEO of Meet Your Mind Online. Jessica has spent the last 8 years working on self development to help coach and assist others in their journey of self discovery and healing. Her objective is to generate a deeper awareness around mental health for individuals and their communities alike, so each person can navigate, understand and pursue the route to inner peace and in return create a life they love.